Best Political Jokes

Panther

Forum Staff
Jul 2013
5,678
3,226
North Texas
#11
An airplane was about to crash; there were 5 passengers on board, but only 4 parachutes. The first passenger said, "I am President Obama, the chosen one. The world needs me, I can't afford to die." So he took the first parachute and left the plane. The second passenger, Julia Gillard, said, "I am the prime Minister of Australia and I am the smartest woman in Australian history, so Australia's people don't want me to die." She took the second parachute and jumped out of the plane. The third passenger, John Kerry, said, "I'm a Senator, and a decorated war hero from the Army of the United States of America ." So he grabbed the parachute next to him and jumped. The fourth passenger, ex-President George W. Bush, said to the fifth passenger, a 10-year-old schoolgirl, "I have lived a full life, and served my country the best I could. I will sacrifice my life and let you have the last parachute." The little girl said, "That's okay, Mr. President. There's a parachute left for you. Australia's smartest woman took my schoolbag."
 
May 2018
3,741
2,737
USA
#12
George Bush was sitting in the Oval Office watching the nightly news of his Iraq invasion when he heard the news commentator report "and 3 Brazilian troops were killed today".

Bush got a panicked look in his eyes, turned to Karl Rove and asked "How many is in a Brazillion"?
 
May 2018
3,741
2,737
USA
#13
People say Trump is a Putin puppet, a Manchurian candidate, but Trump is so stupid that his subconscious has probably forgotten the trigger phrase.
 

Similar Discussions