Christian Grace

Jul 2008
16,945
10,919
Virginia Beach, VA
Have ever seen a trick where a girl walked with a limp and wore special corrective shoes for ten years and then the next day did not?
That wouldn’t be much of a trick. The point is just because you can’t explain something doesn’t mean you should assume God/supernatural.
 
Apr 2013
33,453
22,656
Left coast
Hell, webguy, back in the 60s I used to see people jump out of wheelchairs and throw crutches away and dance up the aisles at a super church every week when some preacher laid hands on them. Every week.

It was a regular series of miracles I tell ya.
 
Nov 2012
16,358
5,487
Michigan
That wouldn’t be much of a trick. The point is just because you can’t explain something doesn’t mean you should assume God/supernatural.
How would someone you went to school with pull off such a trick? My wife attended school with this girl for years, then saw the leg grow.

Not much of a trick? Tell us then , how to do it.
 
Jul 2008
16,945
10,919
Virginia Beach, VA
How would someone you went to school with pull off such a trick? My wife attended school with this girl for years, then saw the leg grow.

Not much of a trick? Tell us then , how to do it.
I can’t.

First of all, all I have are the “details” you’ve provided. Honestly, right now, I have no reason to believe this even happened.

But even if I assume your story is accurate I have no details to try to come up with an explanation.

I do, however, have countless questions.
 
Nov 2012
16,358
5,487
Michigan
I can’t.

First of all, all I have are the “details” you’ve provided. Honestly, right now, I have no reason to believe this even happened.

But even if I assume your story is accurate I have no details to try to come up with an explanation.

I do, however, have countless questions.
Make up any details you need to make the trick work.

You can post some questions if you like, when I get around to it, I’ll try to ask my wife.
 
Apr 2013
33,453
22,656
Left coast
How would someone you went to school with pull off such a trick? My wife attended school with this girl for years, then saw the leg grow.

Not much of a trick? Tell us then , how to do it.
You say your wife saw it but did you? If not, my guess is your wife is lying to you.
 
Jul 2008
16,945
10,919
Virginia Beach, VA
Make up any details you need to make the trick work.

You can post some questions if you like, when I get around to it, I’ll try to ask my wife.
Thank You God by Tim Minchin

I have an apology to make
I'm afraid I've made a big mistake
I turned my face away from you, Lord

I was too blind to see the light
I was too weak to feel Your might
I closed my eyes; I couldn't see the truth, Lord

But then like Saul on the Damascus road,
You sent a messenger to me, and so
Now I've have had the truth revealed to me
Please forgive me all those things I said
I'll no longer betray you, Lord
I will pray to you instead

And I will say thank you, thank you
Thank you, God
Thank you, thank you
Thank you, God...

Thank you, God, for fixing the cataracts of Sam's mum
I had no idea, but it's suddenly so clear now
I feel such a cynic, how could I have been so wrong?
Thank you for displaying how praying works:
A particular prayer in a particular church
Thank you Sam for the chance to acknowledge this
Omnipotent ophthalmologist

Thank you, God, for fixing the cataracts of Sam's mum
I didn't realize that it was so simple
But you've shown a great example of just how it can be done
You only need to pray in a particular spot
To a particular version of a particular god,
And if you pull that off without a hitch,
He will fix one eye of one middle-class white bitch

I know in the past my outlook has been limited
I couldn't see examples of where life had been definitive
But I can admit it when the evidence is clear,
As clear as Sam's mum's new cornea
(And that's extremely clear! )

Thank you, God, for fixing the cataracts of Sam's mum
I have to admit that in the past I have been skeptical
But Sam described this miracle and I am overcome!
How fitting that the sighting of a sight-based intervention
Should open my eyes to this exciting new dimension
It's like someone put an eye chart up in front of me
And the top five letters say: I C, G O D

Thank you, Sam, for showing how my point of view has been so flawed
I assumed there was no God at all but now I see that's cynical
It's simply that his interests aren't particularly broad
He's largely undiverted by the starving masses,
Or the inequality between the various classes
He gives out strictly limited passes,
Redeemable for surgery or two-for-one glasses

I feel so shocking for historically mocking
Your interests are clearly confined to the ocular
I bet given the chance, you'd eschew the divine
And start a little business selling contacts online

Fuck me Sam, what are the odds
That of history's endless parade of gods
That the God you just happened to be taught to believe in
Is the actual God and he digs on healing,
But not the AIDS-ridden African nations
Nor the victims of the plague, nor the flood-addled Asians,
But healthy, privately-insured Australians
With common and curable lens degeneration

The story of Sam's has but a single explanation:
A surgical God who digs on magic operations
No, it couldn't be mistaken attribution of causation
Born of a coincidental temporal correlation
Exacerbated by a general lack of education
Vis-a-vis physics in Sam's parish congregation
No it couldn't be that all these pious people are liars
It couldn't be an artifact of confirmation bias
A product of groupthink,
A mass delusion,
An Emperor's New Clothes-style fear of exclusion

No, it's more likely to be an all-powerful magician
Than the misdiagnosis of the initial condition,
Or one of many cases of spontaneous remission,
Or a record-keeping glitch by the local physician

No, the only explanation for Sam's mum's seeing:
They prayed to an all-knowing superbeing,
To the omnipresent master of the universe,
And he quite liked the sound of their muttered verse.

So for a bit of a change from his usual stunt
Of being a sexist, racist, murderous cunt
He popped down to Dandenong and just like that
Used his powers to heal the cataracts of Sam's mum
Of Sam's mum

Thank you God for fixing the cataracts of Sam's mum!
I didn't realize that it was such a simple thing
I feel such a dingaling, what ignorant scum!

Now I understand a prayer can work:
A particular prayer in a particular church
In a particular style with a particular stuff
And for particular problems that aren't particularly tough,
And for particular people, preferably white
And for particular senses, preferably sight
A particular prayer in a particular spot
To a particular version of a particular god

And if you get that right, he just might
Take a break from giving babies malaria
And pop down to your local area
And fix the cataracts of your mum!